Queries, Self Publishing, Writing

Feeling Twitchy

I recently wrote about the journey I’m going on in finding a literary agent. My Query Experience, or as I like to call it, My Exquerience.

The goal is to do something every Wednesday, whether it’s search for an agent, work on the actual query letter, or submit a query. Well, this morning, I opened my handy dandy spreadsheet that I’ve created of a list of agents who might be a good fit. I clicked on the link to the one at the top of my list, read her submission guidelines… and almost threw up.

Seriously! Even as I’m writing this, my hands are shaking, and I have that rush of nervous adrenaline coursing through my veins. I haven’t even sent anything, or filled out her submission form, and I’m shaking like it’s opening night and I’ve forgotten all my lines. And it’s not even Wednesday! I’m just trying to set myself up for a strong tomorrow.

I guess it’s a good thing. I always say, no matter how many books I publish, I still get sick to my stomach when I think about people reading my work. I tell myself, that if I’m feeling twitchy, it means I care. Well, I must really care about finding a literary agent, because I haven’t been this nervous in years!

If I’ve learned anything since I’ve published my first novel, and in marketing myself on social media, it’s this. Does it make you nervous? Do it anyway. Does is make you sick to your stomach? Do it anyway. Are you afraid people are going to roll their eyes, laugh at you, or gossip about you behind your back? Do it anyway. You get the gist. No matter how it makes you feel, all those uncomfortable, scary feelings. Just do it, because you’ll always wonder, what if… I don’t want those what ifs in my life. I know the rejections are there. I’m expecting them, and embracing them.

I’m also embracing this twitchiness that I’m feeling. I’m going to sit with it for a while and visit these emotions. I’d offer them a cup of coffee, but I think the last thing this vibrating energy needs is more caffeine. This is important to me. So very important. I want this. And if wanting this means there’s a whole lot of twitchy going on, then so be it.

Stay tuned! Tomorrow, I submit the first query of 2022!

1 thought on “Feeling Twitchy”

  1. Lol I can’t sit in the same room with someone who’s reading my work, that’s for sure. And I don’t reread any published pieces I’ve written, because I’m bound to find something I don’t like, but there’s nothing I can do about it, which makes things worse. So ditto on not rereading anything I’ve sent out. Anyway, thanks for this share! Wishing you all the best!

    Liked by 1 person

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